Every Frickin' Joke

Can We Get A Dog?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 22 October 2015; Hits: 3770

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?

Pick him up and suck on his dick!

A Good Choir Boy

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 21 October 2015; Hits: 3487

What is the difference between acne and a catholic priest?

Acne usually comes on a boy's face after he turns 12.

Only You Can Prevent Forest Fires

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 20 October 2015; Hits: 2717

Why doesn't Smokey the Bear have any kids?

Because every time Mrs. Smokey gets hot, he covers her with dirt and beats her with a shovel.

No Luck Here

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 19 October 2015; Hits: 2947

The difference between buying a lottery ticket and fighting with your wife?

You have a chance at winning the lottery.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

I Hope His Prayers Are Answered

A man's been praying at The Wailing Wall in Jerusalem for 20 years. One day he's being interviewed. The reporter says, "You've been praying at The Wailing Wall for 20 years?" The man says, "Absolutely, 20 years. In the morning when I get up, I pray there should be peace in the world. In the afternoon I pray that misery and hunger should be eliminated. And at night I pray that the Israelis and the Palestinians should live together in harmony."

The reporter says, "Well, those are all very nice thoughts. Tell me, how does it feel?"

The man says, "It's like talking to a fucking wall."

Not His Type

An Italian guy Luigi goes up to his neighbor Tony and says, "Hey, Tony... lemme ax you a question. You like-a woman with-a big, sloppy tits, that droop-a down this-a far?" Tony says, "No."

Luigi says, "Hokay. Now, lemme ax you another question. You like-a woman with-a big-a huge-a ass like a dump truck?" Tony says, "Hell, no."

Luigi then says, "Now lemme ax you one more question. You like-a woman with-a big, thick-a mustache and she's-a all the time smell like-a garlic?"

Tony says, "What-a you, crazy?"

Luigi says, "Then why you fuck-a my wife?"

Question For Bird Watchers

Why are crows so damn noisy when they fuck?

Caws!