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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

It's Gonna Be One or the Other

Created: 28 August 2020
Hits: 2272

An old couple's sitting in the living room. The wife turns to her husband and says, "Let's go upstairs and fuck." He looks back and tells her, "I don't know if I can do both."

What's Your Number?

Created: 02 June 2020
Hits: 2501

I just bought the latest sleep-number smart bed. It detects when you're screwing your wife, locks the front door and turns on the stereo so your neighbors can't hear you. My number is 69.

That's Gratitude

Created: 28 August 2019
Hits: 2667

I spent 5 thousand bucks on a boob job for the wife and she was thrilled. So I go another 2 grand on her nose job and she's ecstatic.

But I spend 50 bucks on a blow job and she goes ballistic. Fucking women.

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There's A Card For Everything

Hallmark Card fail:

"My tire was thumping, I thought it was flat. Looked underneath and noticed your cat."

Gotta Stay In Business

What do pimps and farmers have in common?

They both need a hoe to stay in business.

Pretty Bad

What would you call a woman who goes out with You?

Desperate!

Happy Valentines Day!

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