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What Would You Do For A Klondike Bar?

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 26 October 2015
Hits: 3473

What is a lesbian's favorite thing to eat?

A Klondike Bar.

Just One Question

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 25 October 2015
Hits: 3207

I think I know the answer... but I'm gonna ask it anyway, Would you rather meet your girlfriend in the park or park your meat in your girlfriend? Just what I thought!

Black Listed

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 24 October 2015
Hits: 4040

Three couples, one older, one middle-aged and one newlywed want to join a church club. So they go down to the church to meet with the pastor who is responsible for screening couples before they join. After the pastor tells them about all the benefits of joining, he explains that in order to qualify, they must refrain from having sex for one month. If they fail they would not be approved for membership. The three couples each agree and head on home.

A month later, the three couples return and and sit down again with the pastor. He asks the older couple if they had abstained from having sex. The older couple replied, "Oh yeah, no problem." and they are allowed to join.

Next the middle-aged couple were asked the same question and their reply was the same. So they too were approved for membership.

Finally the pastor asked the newlyweds the same question and the husband responded: "Well, it went great for a couple of weeks. But one day my wife was reaching for a can of corn on a shelf and she dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and I just couldn't stand it. That's when I said the hell with it and screwed her right there."

The pastor was shocked but said: "You realize that now you won't be allowed into the club."

The husband replied: "Oh that's okay, we're not allowed back into Safeway either!"

Get My Gun

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 23 October 2015
Hits: 4239

There once was a farmer who had three daughters. All three were going on a date on the same night, so he decided to meet their dates at the front door with a shotgun, just to let them know he was protective.

The first boy showed up and said "Hi, my name is Joe, I'm here for Flo. We're going to a show. Is she ready to go?" The farmer approved and sent them on their way.

Then the second boy arrived and he said "Hi, my name is Freddie, I'm here for Betty. We're going for spaghetti. Is she ready?" The farmer approved and sent them on their way as well.

Finally, the third boy arrived and he said "Hi my name is Chuck, ..." And the farmer shot him.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Out Of Warranty

When her car conks out the old lady pushes it into a gas station. Soon the mechanic has it purring like a kitten.
The old gal asks: "What's up?"
He tells her: "Crap in the carburetor."
She says: "How often do I have to do that?"

Analyze This

A guy visits a psychiatrist and lies on the couch. The doc asks: "What's your problem?"

The guy tells him, "Doc, I can't seem to make any friends. Can you help me, you fat fuck?"

Settling the Same Sex Marriage Debate

My wife and I were discussing the news. I said: "What's the big deal about same-sex marriage?"

She said: "You're right. We've been married for years, and we keep having the same lousy sex."

And that's when the fight started...

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