Every Frickin' Joke

What night is it?

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 03 November 2015; Hits: 3682

What's the difference between a wife and the trash can sittin' in your garage?

You at least take the trash out once a week.

What's Your Favorite Burger Joint?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 02 November 2015; Hits: 2933

How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?

He forgot to wrap his whopper.

Your Kind Of Game?

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 01 November 2015; Hits: 4250

What is the only game in which the more you lose, the more you have to show for it?

Strip Poker.

Cats Life

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 31 October 2015; Hits: 3032

How do you know when your cat's done cleaning himself?

He's smoking a cigarette.

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Turn The Beat Around

A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, the doctor notices a red “H” on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” he asks. “Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we screw,” she replies.

A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, the doctor notices a blue “Y” on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” he asks. “Oh, my boyfriend goes to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when he's banging me,” she replies.

A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green “M” on her chest. “Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?” asks the doctor. “No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin. Why do you ask?”

Religious Instruction

Teacher: "What do you know about the Resurrection?"

Johnny: "If it lasts more than 4 hrs call your doctor."

Hate To Cop An Attitude, But...

I quit my job at the helium gas factory.

I refuse to be spoken to in that tone of voice.