Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Two old ladies are sitting on the park bench feeding the pigeons. Suddenly the first one says to her friend: "Did you just fart?"

Her friend answers: "Of course I did. You think I always smell like this?"

A guy asks his grandma, "Have you seen some pills around here? They are labeled LSD?"

His grandma replies, "Fuck your pills, there's a dragon in the kitchen!"

Nacho comes before a judge. The judge asks: "Why're you here?" Nacho tells him: "I'm accused of starting my Xmas shopping early."

The judge says, "That's not a crime. How early did you start?"

Nacho says, "Before the store opened."

A guy goes into a bank for a business loan.

The bank manager says, "What kind of business do you want to start?"

The guy says, "I have some black powder. You sprinkle it on pussy and it makes it taste like a peach."

The bank manager says, "I'm afraid we're not interested."

A few months later the guy walks into the bank pushing a wheel barrel full of money.

The bank manager says, "I see that idea for black powder really paid off."

The guy says, "Nah, that didn't go anywhere. I made my money with this white powder."

The bank manager says, "What does it do?"

The guy says, "Give me a peach and I'll show you."