D*ck Joke of the Day
A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.
  • Home
  • Dick Jokes
  • Just Plain Funny
  • That's when the fight started
  • WTF?!
  • About
  • Send Dick A Joke

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

  1. You are here:  
  2. Home
  3. Every Frickin' Joke

Every Frickin' Joke

Her Life Matters

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 05 October 2020
Hits: 2729
Working in the garage this morning my wife barges in nagging about not showing her any respect. She demands I recognize her life has value too.
So I pick her up, give her a big hug and dump her in the recycle bin.
And that's when the fight started...

It's Gonna Be One or the Other

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 28 August 2020
Hits: 2425

An old couple's sitting in the living room. The wife turns to her husband and says, "Let's go upstairs and fuck." He looks back and tells her, "I don't know if I can do both."

What's Your Number?

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 02 June 2020
Hits: 2660

I just bought the latest sleep-number smart bed. It detects when you're screwing your wife, locks the front door and turns on the stereo so your neighbors can't hear you. My number is 69.

You Don't Have To Be An Epidemiologist

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 10 May 2020
Hits: 2611

Question: Which is more vicious... Killer Bees or Asian Murder Hornets?

Answer: My ex-wife.

Page 1 of 286

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • 6
  • 7
  • 8
  • 9
  • 10

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Women Are Emotional

My wife told me I should be more affectionate.

So I told her I got a girlfriend.

And that's when the fight started...

Who's Your Daddy?

Johnson took his latest invention, a computerized crystal ball, to his banker hoping to get a business loan. The banker was skeptical, so Johnson said to give it a try.

The banker typed "Where's my father?" and instantly the reply came back "Fishing in Michigan."

The banker said "I knew this thing wouldn't work. My father's been dead for twenty years."

Johnson begged him "No.wait. Try asking in a different way."

So the banker tried "Where's my mother's husband?"

And bang the answer came back: "Your mother's husband has been dead for twenty years. Your father just landed a three pound trout."

Divide and Conquer

1/3 of women not interested in sex. Me too. The 1/3 from the neck up...meh. From the tits down? I'm in.

Copyright © 2026 D*ck Joke Of The Day. All Rights Reserved.