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Her Life Matters

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 05 October 2020
Hits: 2915
Working in the garage this morning my wife barges in nagging about not showing her any respect. She demands I recognize her life has value too.
So I pick her up, give her a big hug and dump her in the recycle bin.
And that's when the fight started...

It's Gonna Be One or the Other

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 28 August 2020
Hits: 2609

An old couple's sitting in the living room. The wife turns to her husband and says, "Let's go upstairs and fuck." He looks back and tells her, "I don't know if I can do both."

What's Your Number?

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 02 June 2020
Hits: 2816

I just bought the latest sleep-number smart bed. It detects when you're screwing your wife, locks the front door and turns on the stereo so your neighbors can't hear you. My number is 69.

You Don't Have To Be An Epidemiologist

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 10 May 2020
Hits: 2748

Question: Which is more vicious... Killer Bees or Asian Murder Hornets?

Answer: My ex-wife.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Can We Get A Dog?

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?

Pick him up and suck on his dick!

Rather Have A Puppy

Little Johnny is walking along with his father and they pass two dogs that are going at it. He says, "Hey, Pop! What's happenin' over there?"

His father says, "Er... son, they're making a puppy."

That night, Little Johnny walks past his parents bedroom, and the old man's giving it to the old lady. Little Johnny says, "Hey, Pop! What's happenin' now?"

His father says, "Er...son, we're making you a baby brother."

Little Johnny says, "Well, flip her over. I'd rather have a puppy."

A Lot On The Side

How can you tell when your girlfriend's getting really fat?

You start asking your wife for sex.

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