A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Every Frickin' Joke

Her Life Matters

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Hits: 2732
Working in the garage this morning my wife barges in nagging about not showing her any respect. She demands I recognize her life has value too.
So I pick her up, give her a big hug and dump her in the recycle bin.
And that's when the fight started...

It's Gonna Be One or the Other

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 2428

An old couple's sitting in the living room. The wife turns to her husband and says, "Let's go upstairs and fuck." He looks back and tells her, "I don't know if I can do both."

What's Your Number?

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 2663

I just bought the latest sleep-number smart bed. It detects when you're screwing your wife, locks the front door and turns on the stereo so your neighbors can't hear you. My number is 69.

You Don't Have To Be An Epidemiologist

Category: Just Plain Funny
Hits: 2613

Question: Which is more vicious... Killer Bees or Asian Murder Hornets?

Answer: My ex-wife.

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Wasn't The Sex Ed Class I Had

Here we are in Sex Education Class. The teacher says, "All right, class, I want you to go home and come back tomorrow with as many positions as you can think of for having sex."

The next day she calls on Little Johnny in the back, "Well, John, how many positions did you come up with?" Little Johnny says, "Seventy-three."

The teacher says, "Oh, my goodness...uh...very good, John, very good..."

Next she calls on Becky in the front and says, "All right, Becky, how about you?" Becky says, "Gee, teacher, I only came up with one...where the guy just lays on top of the girl."

From the back Little Johnny yells out, "Seventy-four."

My Wife Loves To Bake

I came home one evening and my wife was in the kitchen crying.

She told me she had baked me a pie and the dog ate it.

I told her: "Don't cry honey. I'll buy you another dog."

And that's when the fight started.

STDs Can Be Pretty Rough

What did the guy say to his dick when he saw the girl he was about to fuck had genital warts?

"Hang on, boy! It's gonna be a bumpy ride!"