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Her Life Matters

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 05 October 2020
Hits: 2917
Working in the garage this morning my wife barges in nagging about not showing her any respect. She demands I recognize her life has value too.
So I pick her up, give her a big hug and dump her in the recycle bin.
And that's when the fight started...

It's Gonna Be One or the Other

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 28 August 2020
Hits: 2614

An old couple's sitting in the living room. The wife turns to her husband and says, "Let's go upstairs and fuck." He looks back and tells her, "I don't know if I can do both."

What's Your Number?

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 02 June 2020
Hits: 2822

I just bought the latest sleep-number smart bed. It detects when you're screwing your wife, locks the front door and turns on the stereo so your neighbors can't hear you. My number is 69.

You Don't Have To Be An Epidemiologist

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 10 May 2020
Hits: 2750

Question: Which is more vicious... Killer Bees or Asian Murder Hornets?

Answer: My ex-wife.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Should Have Become A Gynecologist

What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common?

A wet nose.

All Present And Accounted For

A manager hired a new secretary who was young, sweet and proper. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open. As she left the room, she politely remarked, “Sir, did you know your barracks door is open?”

At first the boss didn't understand what she meant. But later he looked down and saw his open zipper. That's when he decided to have a little fun with his new hire. Calling her back in, he asked, “By the way, Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door open this morning, did you notice a soldier standing at attention?”

To which his secretary very smartly replied, “Why, no sir. All I saw was a disabled veteran, sitting on two duffel bags!”

It's not because you are color blind...

What's the difference between pink and purple?

The grip!

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