A guy says, "For our Twentieth Anniversary, I'm taking my wife to Australia."
His friend says, "That's going to be tough to beat. What're you going to do for your Twenty-Fifth Anniversary?"
The first guy says, "I'm going to go back and get her."
A guy bends his wife over the kitchen table and fucks her in the ass. When he's finished he asks: "Did you like that?"
She tells him: "I'd have liked it a lot more if the kids were done eating."
How many teamsters does it take to change a lightbulb?
Twelve ... you got a problem?
Husband: "What would you like for your anniversary, Sylvia?"
Wife: "A divorce, Bernie."
Husband: "I wasn't planning on spending that much."
And that's when the fight started...