Keep On Dreaming This Thanksgiving

What's a Turkeys favorite song?

"I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas"

Don't Forget to Eat Your Veggies

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?

Putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done.

(Hope that one wasn't too bad!)

Biggest Turkey You Got

A lady was looking for a turkey but couldn't find one big enough. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"

The stock boy replied, "No. They're dead."

Lots Of Scarifies in Life

I told my wife I was so pleased she treated me like a God. She looked at me and asked, "What do you mean?"

I told her, "Every evening at dinner you give me a burnt offering."

And that's when the fight started...