A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Not Another Chicken Joke

Why did the chicken fall into the well?

He didn't see that well.

My Kind Of Vacation

What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control?

A trip without the kids!

Best Way To Go

When I die, I want to go like my Grandfather...in his sleep.

Not screaming like the other passengers in his car.

Women Are Emotional

My wife told me I should be more affectionate.

So I told her I got a girlfriend.

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Why So Sad?

Why do women wear black underwear?

They're in mourning for the stiff they buried the night before.

On The Night Beat

A cop pulls a guy over one night for swerving in and out of lanes on the highway. He tells the guy to blow into a breathalyzer. "I can't do that, officer, I'm an asthmatic. I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube."

"OK, we'll just get a urine sample down at the station." "Can't do that either, officer. I'm a diabetic. I could get low blood sugar if I pee in a cup."

"Alright, we'll take a blood sample." "Can't do that either, officer. I'm a hemophiliac. If I give blood, I could die."

"Fine then, just walk this white line." "Can't do that either, officer." "Why not?"

"Because I'm drunk."

In This Corner

What's it called when a WWE wrestler ties his opponent's dick in a knot?

A Willie Nelson.