I Came All Over That Place
Last night, I finally realized a longtime fantasy... I came all over my girlfriend's face.
Man, was she pissed when she woke up.
Last night, I finally realized a longtime fantasy... I came all over my girlfriend's face.
Man, was she pissed when she woke up.
A guy and his date were parked on lovers lane at the top of a hill overlooking the city. Just as he made his move the gal stopped him and said: “I really should've told you this earlier, but I’m actually a hooker. If you want to get laid tonight it'll cost you 30 bucks.” Reluctantly the guy forked over the money, then screwed her in the back seat.
When they got back in front the guy just sat in the driver’s seat staring out the window. “Why aren’t we going anywhere?” the girl asked. “Well," the guy said, "I should've mentioned this before, but I’m actually a taxi driver... and the fare back to town is $35.00!”
My wife's losing weight now thanks to a weight loss club. She goes near the fridge, I hit her with the club.
One night my wife tried to get a rise out of me and make me jealous. She asked: "Honey, what would you say if I was having sex with your best friend?"
I told her: "I'd say you're a lesbian!"
And that's when the fight started...