Where Are You Going?

Why is sperm white and piss yellow?

So you know if you're cumming or going!

Like Father, Like Son

If my son farts or has his hands down his pants, my wife smiles and says, “Like father, like son!”

Yesterday we caught him screwing the neighbor, but for some reason it wasn’t so funny when I said it.

Until I Met A Guy Who Had No Feet...

A guy wakes up in the hospital: "Doc, I can't feel my legs!"

Doc: "That's because we amputated your arms."

Tough Times Call For One Thing...

My wife was concerned that we weren't managing the household well in tough financial times. So she asked me to take some action and plan for the future.

No problem I told her. I ran out and came home with 2 cases of beer instead of one.

And that's when the fight started...