Done But Not Retired

What would you call a hooker with jizz all over her face?

Call her a cab ... her job is done.

What's Her Name?

What do you call hooker that likes it in the ass?

A crack whore.

Paralysis Comes Easy

How do you paralyze a woman from the waist down?

Marry her.

I Always Wonder Why

It was our anniversary and I was reminiscing with my wife. She asked if I could remember way back when.

I told her: "You know honey, I can remember where we got married and I can remember when we got married... I just can’t remember why."

And that's when the fight started.