DJ of the Day

What actress would you like to be stuck in an elevator with?

One who knows how to fix elevators.

What do you call a teenager who doesn't masturbate?

A liar.

What's the difference between the lesbians in porn films and a lesbian in real life?

About 65 pounds.

The other night I was having sex with my wife when my cell phone rang. I answered it and said: "Can I call you back? I'm in the tub."

And that's when the fight started...

What did the guy say to his dick when he saw the girl he was about to fuck had genital warts?

"Hang on, boy! It's gonna be a bumpy ride!"

My wife told me I should be more affectionate.

So I told her I got a girlfriend.

And that's when the fight started...

A car salesman sits down at a bar next to a hooker.

He orders a drink and says: "If I don't sell some cars I'm going to lose my ass."

The hooker looks at him and says: "Yeah... well if I don't sell some ass I'm gonna lose my car."

Dick's Joke of the Day