A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Things Have Gone Too Far

What is more messed up than fingering your sister?

Pulling your finger out and finding your dad's wedding ring.

Done But Not Retired

What would you call a hooker with jizz all over her face?

Call her a cab ... her job is done.

Sex Change

What do you call a nun with a sex change operation?

A tran-sister.

It's A Celebration

My wife smiled at breakfast this morning and said: "Today is our anniversary darling... what should we do?"

I told her: "Stand in silence for 2 minutes."

And that;s when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Two Blondes Checking The Tracks

Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks. The first blonde said: "These look like deer tracks." The other one said: "No they look like moose tracks."

They argued and argued for a while. They were still arguing when the train hit them.

The Diagnosis

An old guy visits a doctor. The doctor examines him and then sits down in the office for a consultation on his diagnosis.

"Well..." the doctor begins,  "I'm sorry to have to tell you this... but you have cancer and you have Alzheimers."

The old guy looks at the doctor for a moment then says: "Thank god I don't have cancer."

As He Walked Through The Bar

A young guy walks into a bar and as he passes an old man sitting there the old guy looks up and blurts out: "I fucked your mother."

The young guy ignores the old coot and keeps on walkin' when the old guy shouts: "Your mother sucks my dick".

So the young guy turns back and says: "Dad... your drunk... go home."