A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Time To Do Some Lawn Work

What's the best part of gardening?

Getting down and dirty with my hoes.

Chip Off The Old Block

Toilet seat falls on kid's dick, runs to mom: Kiss it, make it better.

Mom: Every day more like your dad.

Too Old For That

A ninety-year-old guy is walking by a lake when he hears, "Hi, there." He looks down, and it's a bullfrog.
He picks it up, and the frog says, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."
The old guy unzips his bag, puts in the frog, and starts to zip it back up. The frog says, "What are you doing?"
The old guy says, "At my age, I'd rather have a talking frog."

She Interrupted The Game

My wife popped in while I was watching the game and asked: "Want some supper?"

Without looking up I replied: "What are my choices?" She fired back: "Yes and no!"

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Get A Job

I'm trying to write a joke about unemployed people.

It needs more work.

No Talking In The Library

The blonde said: "I want French fries and a diet Coke."

The librarian looked at her and snapped: "This is a library!"

So the blonde leaned in and whispered: "Sorry ... I want French Fries and a diet Coke."

It Takes More Than One

After weeks without gettin' any I got really pissed off and asked my wife: "What has two arms, two legs, two boobs & sucks?"

Before she could even think of a reply I told her: "You and a vacuum cleaner."

And that's when the fight started...