Every Frickin' Joke

Best Chance For A Full Recovery

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 01 September 2017; Hits: 2916

Surgeons prefer operating on politicians.

No guts, heart or spine & the mouth & asshole are interchangeable.

In Any Language

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 31 August 2017; Hits: 2748

What do the aborigine call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.

Don't Do That Again

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 30 August 2017; Hits: 2882

Johnson finds wife in bed with a friend, shoots him.

"Keep behaving like that you'll lose all your friends." she snaps at him.

And that's when the fight started...

There's A Card For Everything

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 29 August 2017; Hits: 2696

Hallmark Card fail:

"My tire was thumping, I thought it was flat. Looked underneath and noticed your cat."

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What Is This, A Joke?

A Jew, a Catholic and a Mormon were having drinks at the bar after an interfaith convention.

The Jew, bragging about his virility said, "I have four sons, one more and I’ll have a basketball team!"

The Catholic pooh-poohed this accomplishment, stating, "That’s nothing, I have 10 sons, one more and I’ll have a football team."

To which the Mormon replied, "You guys don't have a clue. I have 17 wives, one more and I’ll have a golf course!"

Can Lawyers Swim?

What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean.

A good start.

Every day a homeless drunk watches a guy stop and whisper to every chick that walks by. Sometimes the girl walks away a little confused. Sometimes the girl smiles, grabs the guy by the arm and they walk off to the motel across the street.

One day the homeless guy walks over and asks: "Hey buddy, what are you sayin' to those girls to get all that action?" The guy tells him: "I take the simple, direct approach. I first whisper 'Tickle your ass with a feather?' If the girl smiles and says sure, I know I've scored. But if she's offended I quickly repeat 'Particularly nasty weather' like she didn't hear me right and then just move on. Works every time!"

The drunk thinks what a great idea and decides to try it himself. Waiting on the corner he stumbles over to the first girl that walks by and shouts at her: "Shove a feather up your ass?" The girl looks totally shocked. So heeding his lesson he quickly covers by saying: "It's fucking raining."