Every Frickin' Joke

Not So Bon Vivant

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 10 September 2017; Hits: 3384

What do you call a guy who expects to get laid on the second date?

Slow.

Divide and Conquer

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 09 September 2017; Hits: 3555

1/3 of women not interested in sex. Me too. The 1/3 from the neck up...meh. From the tits down? I'm in.

Take the Plea

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 08 September 2017; Hits: 3148

Judge Calloway's court docket was too full.

So he knocked the sodomy charge down to "following too close."

Take A Walk On The Boardwalk

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 06 September 2017; Hits: 2851

My wife cheats when we play board games. Last night I'm playing Monopoly with the kids and she was in the garage bangin' the landscaper.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Salad

What do you call an epileptic in a vegetable garden?

Seizure Salad.

One Morning On The Farm

One lazy morning a little farm boy is told to do his chores. He hates getting up early, so after he slops the hogs he angrily kicks one as he leaves. Then he feeds the chickens and kicks one on the way to the barn. Finally he milks the cow and before heading home he gives that cow one swift kick.

When he sits down at the breakfast table his mother says: "I've been watching you. You kicked the hog so no bacon for you. You kicked the chicken so no eggs for you. And you kicked the cow so no milk for you."

Just then his dad walks in from plowing the back forty and angrily kicks the cat out of the way. The little boy looks at his mom and says: "Should you tell him or should I."

Not the Same Old Routine

My wife wanted to be a little playful, so she whispered: "Say dirty things to me!"

So I said: "Bathroom, kitchen, living room..."

And that's when the fight started...