Every Frickin' Joke

Musings From George Burns

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 05 September 2017; Hits: 2281

1st you forget names, then faces. Next it's pulling your zipper up, And finally you forget to pull it down.

Knew It Wouldn't Work

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 04 September 2017; Hits: 2336

My wife suggested we go to a marriage counselor to work on our relationship. I said sure. We get there and the therapist asks me to tell how I felt.

I said: "I knew right from the beginning our marriage wouldn't work. I'm an Aquarius and she's a cunt."

And that's when the fight started...

Won't Be A Starving Artist Much Longer

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 03 September 2017; Hits: 2375

Gallery owner: "Guy came in bought all your paintings."

Artist: "Great."

"Not really, he was your doctor."

More Than One Way To Please

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 02 September 2017; Hits: 2750

The masochist begs: "Beat me, beat me."

The sadist smiles and says: "Nooooo!"

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Where Shall We Go?

My wife wanted to go on a pleasure trip.

I told her: "Great, let's take your mother to the airport."

And that's when the fight started...

Yeah... It Was Her Fault

A woman's in labor. She's got her feet up in the stirrups, screaming in pain and cursing her husband.

He turns and says, "Hey, don't blame me. I wanted to stick it in your ass, but you said, 'No, that'll hurt.' "

My Wife Was Feeling Sick

Before I left for work my wife told me she wasn't feeling well. I told her: "Don't worry honey, you're not really sick."

She asked: "How do you know?"

I told her: "Because I didn't have to carry you downstairs to make my breakfast."

And that's when the fight started.