How can you tell if your husband is dead?
The sex is the same but you get to use the remote.
Got home to find a man in bed with my wife. "Who said you could sleep with my wife?"
He said, "Everybody."
I have a a real problem with sex and booze...
Every time I have sex, my girlfriend boos.
What should you do if your clothes are on fire?
Don't put 'em on.