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I Wanna Watch

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 05 December 2018
Hits: 7014

What's the difference between a pickpocket and a Peeping Tom? A pickpocket snatches watches.

The Doctor Has News For You!

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 13 September 2017
Hits: 2622

Guy goes to his doctor for a checkup. After, they sit down in a private office to discuss the results. The doc starts with: "I have good news and I have bad news."

The guy says: "Give me the bad news doc." The doctor replies: "You've got cancer!"

The guy is shocked, but quickly asks: "So what's the good news?"

The doctor looks him in the eye and tells him: "I'm fucking the receptionist."

A Winning Idea

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 12 September 2017
Hits: 2847

I asked my wife what she'd do if I won the lottery. She told me she'd take half and leave me.

So I told her: "Great! I won 10 bucks on a scratch-off this morning. Here's your five, now get the fuck out."

And that's when the fight started...

Location, Location, Location

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 11 September 2017
Hits: 2940

Teenage daughter after a movie: "Had to change my seat 3 times."

Mom: "Did someone harass you?"

"Finally!"

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

It Takes Two

I asked my wife what she thought my two greatest assets were?

She said: "A closed mouth and an open wallet."

And that's when the fight started...

I Know Her By Reputation

How do you know who gives a good blow job?

Word of mouth.

A New Accessory

My son gets behind the wheel of the car to take his first driving lesson. As mom gets in the passenger side he rolls down the window and asks: "Does this car have passenger side air bags?"

I said, "It does now."

And that's when the fight started...

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