What do the aborigine call a boomerang that won't come back?
A stick.
A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says, “Five beers, please”.
Last year, I bought my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift.
This year I didn't buy her anything..
When my wife asked me why I didn't buy her mother a gift this year I told her "Hey, she never used the gift I bought her last year!"
And that's when the fight started...
What do you call two lesbians in a closet?
A liqour cabinet.
