A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Every Frickin' Joke

Soon Enough Young Man

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 2307

Little Johnny in the bathtub points at his dick: "Mommy, is my brain in there?"

"Not yet, sweetie."

A Change of Habit

Category: Just Plain Funny
Hits: 2467

Topless babe walks up to 2 guys on the beach wearing Hawaiian shirts. They look her up and down and smile. She smiles back and says: "Hello, Fathers."

One guy asks her: "How did you know we're priests?"

"I'm Sister Mary Kathryn. We take vacations, too."

Let There Be Light

Category: Just Plain Funny
Hits: 2000

How many Irishmen does it take to change a light bulb?

Ten. 1 holds the bulb & 9 drink till the room spins.

Not Quite A Cure

Category: Just Plain Funny
Hits: 2116

A doctor told his patient her test results came back and she had a rare disease with only 6 months to live.

"That's such a short amount of time." the woman begged, "Isn't there anything I can do?"

"Marry a lawyer," the doctor told her. "It will be the longest six months of your life."

Page 10 of 286

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Man Of The Year

A man steps into the street and manages to grab a taxi just going by. He gets in, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

The passenger asks, "Who?" The cabbie says, "Frank Feldman. There's a guy who did everything right. Like my coming along just when you needed a cab. It would have happened like that to Frank every time."

Passenger: "Yeah. But there's always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie says, "Not Frank. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam in tennis. He could golf with the pros. And music? He sang like an opera baritone, danced like a Broadway star, and you should've heard him play the piano."

The passenger replies, "Sounds like he was really someone special."

Cab driver continues, "There's more... He had a mind like a computer. He could remember everybody's birthday, knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out."

Passenger: "Wow, some incredible guy"

The cabbie goes on, "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic to avoid traffic jams. Not like me... I always seem to get stuck in them all the time."

Passenger: "Mmm, there's not many like him around."

Cabbie: "And he knew how to treat a woman, how to really make her feel good. He'd never answer her back even if she was in the wrong. And his clothing was always immaculate, down to his highly polished shoes."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank."

Passenger: "Then how do you know so much about him?"

Cabbie: "I married his fucking widow..."

Kosher for Passover

A husband sees his wife is getting ready to prepare for Passover. "This year I really want to help out." he tells her, "Whatever you need me to do, ask... I will do it." His wife tells him, "Don't take this the wrong way, but the best thing you can do to help is to leave the house and let me get my work done without any interruptions." So the husband does exactly what she asks and leaves.

Three hours later his wife hears him come back in. She shouts, "I thought I told that the best way to help me would be to leave." He responds, "You expect me to help the whole day?"

And that's when the fight started...

Turned That List Into a Rap Sheet

Why did Santa get arrested?

He got caught laying Barbie under the Christmas tree!