Every Frickin' Joke

It's Kind Of Like Dollar Pizza

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 16 June 2015; Hits: 2756

How's pussy like pizza?

The worst you'll ever have won't be all that bad.

What's That In Your Pants

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 15 June 2015; Hits: 2748

My wife thought she would come on real sexy to distract me from the game. So she asked: "Honey, What do you have in your pants that's gonna wind up in my face?"

I looked up and said: "Wrinkles."

And that's when the fight started...

I Can't Hear You

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 14 June 2015; Hits: 2426

What do you call a deaf bully?

Anything you want.

No Greater Feeling

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 13 June 2015; Hits: 2897

Why is being in the military like a blowjob?

The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Almost Crapped My Pants!

Bob and Martha have been married for 15 years. Every morning for 15 years, Bob wakes up, farts loudly, rolls over onto his back and gets up for work. Every morning for 15 years, Martha says, "One of these days, you're gonna fart your guts out!"

One Thanksgiving morning, Martha's preparing the turkey and gets an idea. Before her husband gets up, she creeps upstairs and places the turkey innards in his pajama bottoms, giggling to herself. Well, later that morning, Bob wakes up and goes through his morning ritual. He screams as he goes running into the bathroom. Martha laughs, but is concerned after noticing that Bob has been in the bathroom for 3 hours.

She runs upstairs, and is about to knock on the door, when Bob opens up, pale as a ghost.

He says, "You were right. You were right. I did fart my guts out, but by the grace of God and these two fingers I got them back up there again."

You Don't Scare Me

A lady's sick of her husband's drinking, so she decides to teach him a lesson. She dresses up like Satan, and when her husband walks in from being out all night, she jumps out from behind the sofa and screams.

The guy looks at her and says, "You don't scare me. I'm married to your sister."

Only Fools Fall In Love

My wife and I had our usual back and forth at breakfast when I finally said: "You know, I was a fool when I married you."

She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice."

And that's when the fight started...