Why is being in the military like a blowjob?
The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.
Dear Santa,
I've been good all year. Okay, most of the time. Well, more like once in a while...
Oh f*ck it I'll buy my own shit!
- Billy
My dick's so big it was overthrown by a military coup. It's now known as the Democratic Republic of My Dick.
A guy was organizing his cards for Valentine's Day and realized he made a huge mistake!
"For fucks sake, what a mess to sort out. I can't believe I've mixed their Valentine's Day cards up.
The girlfriend now thinks I love her and the wife thinks I want to fuck her."
