The only thing wrong with sex on television is that you could fall off.
Little Johnny in the bathtub points at his dick: "Mommy, is my brain in there?"
"Not yet, sweetie."
I told my wife: "Honey, I don't like how you look with the new glasses on." She said: "Sweetheart, I don't wear any glasses."
I said: "Yeah, but I do."
And that's when the fight started...
Dwarf to doctor: You're pretty busy. You treat dwarfs?
Doc: Yeah but you'll have to be a little patient.
