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A Dead Man!

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 06 July 2015
Hits: 3745

After 20 years of marriage, I still get blow jobs.

If my wife finds out, she'll fucking kill me.

Doggie Style

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 05 July 2015
Hits: 2560

A guy, seeing two dogs going at it on the lawn says to his buddy, "You and your wife ever do it like that?"

"Only once" says his friend. "And it took 5 drinks to get her out in the yard."

Pay Back Is A Bitch

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 04 July 2015
Hits: 2138

I was furious when I found our joint checking account was empty. When I confronted my wife all she said was, "It's my turn." "What do you mean, your turn?" I shot back.

"In bed," she told me, "you've been making early withdrawals for years. Now... it's my turn."

And that's when the fight started...

Let's Think About Sex

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 03 July 2015
Hits: 2697

What do women think about during sex? That depends...

The prostitute thinks: "That's all."

The nymphomaniac thinks: "That's all?"

The housewife thinks: "Beige...yes, I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

There's Only One Alternative

Guy tells his buddy: "I think I've become di-sexual."

Friend asks: "Di-sexual? What the hell is that?"

Guy says: "If I don't get me some pussy pretty soon... I'm gonna kill myself."

That Little Prick

Brenda and Steve took their six-year-old son to the doctor. With some hesitation, they explained that although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small penis. After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, "Just feed him pancakes. That should solve the problem."

The next morning when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table. "Gee, Mom," he exclaimed, "Are those all for me?"

"Just take two," his mom replied. "The rest are for your father."

Asked About A Nun

How do you get a nun pregnant?

Dress her up as an altar boy.

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