Every Frickin' Joke

Not So Difficult After All

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 27 July 2017; Hits: 2782

Lifehack: How do you find a needle in a haystack?

Easy... burn the fuckin' hay! Any more questions?

Ten Items or Less

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 26 July 2017; Hits: 3032

Gal to cashier: "I'm in a hurry, can you please check me out?"

Clerk looks her up & down: "Nice tits, babe!"

At The Cattle Auction

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 25 July 2017; Hits: 2708

My wife was amazed to read about a farmer who claimed he sold a cow with a pussy like a woman for $10,000.

I told her: "That's not amazing, that's irony. Here I am with you... a pussy like a cow, and you ain't worth shit."

And that's when the fight started...

In This Corner

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 24 July 2017; Hits: 2667

What's it called when a WWE wrestler ties his opponent's dick in a knot?

A Willie Nelson.

Page 18 of 286

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Salad

What do you call an epileptic in a vegetable garden?

Seizure Salad.

That Big?

I don't wanna brag, but my dick is so big, the head has only seen my balls in pictures. Get that ladies?

One Day At The Vet's

Three Labrador retrievers - chocolate, yellow, and black - are in the waiting room at the vet's office when they strike up a conversation.

The black lab turns to the chocolate and says, "So why are you here?" The chocolate lab replies, "I'm a pisser. I piss on everything – the sofa, the drapes, the cat, the kids. But the final straw was last night, when I pissed in the middle of my owner's bed." The black lab says, "So what is the vet going to do?" "Gonna give me Prozac," came the reply from the chocolate lab. "All the vets are prescribing it. It works for everything."

The black lab then turns to the yellow lab and asks, "Why are you here?" The yellow lab says, "I'm a digger. I dig under fences, dig up flowers and trees, I dig just for the hell of it. When I'm inside, I dig up the carpets. But I went over
the line last night when I dug a great big hole in my owner's couch." "So what are they going to do to you?" the black lab inquired. "Looks like Prozac for me too," the dejected yellow lab said.

Then the yellow lab turns to the black lab and asks what he's at the vet's office for. "I'm a humper," the black lab says. "I'll hump anything. I'll hump the cat, a pillow, the table, fire hydrants, whatever. I want to hump everything I see. Yesterday, my owner had just gotten out of the shower and was bending over to dry her toes, and I just couldn't help myself I hopped on her back and started humping away."

The yellow and chocolate labs exchange a sad glance and say, "So, Prozac for you too, huh?"

The black lab says, ‘Nah... just here to get my nails clipped."