Every Frickin' Joke
Out For A Drive
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 3146
"Was your car ride with Grandma fun?"
"No Grampa. We didn't see any assholes, dumb bastards or shitheads."
Let's Pretend
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 2833
Sally: "Let's play house."
Little Johnny: "What do I do?"
Sally: "Communicate your feelings."
Johnny: "How do I do that?"
Sally: "Perfect. You can be the husband!"
No Advice Needed
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 3117
Little Johnny was on a park bench stuffing all of his Halloween candy in his mouth. An old lady walked up, saying: "Son, don't you know that eating all of that candy will rot your teeth, give you acne, and make you sick?"
"My grandfather lived to be 105 years old!" replied Johnny.
"Did he eat five candy bars at a sitting?" the old lady retorted.
"No," said Johnny, "but he minded his own freakin' business."
Just A Little Peak
- Category: And that's when the fight started...
- Hits: 2829
Mr. & Mrs. Johnson are at the bank when an armed robber bursts in. Realizing he forgot his mask, the robber makes everyone lie face down and warns them not to look at him or he'll shoot.
Sure enough one stupid customer sneaks a look, and BAM! the robber shoots him on the spot. The robber then asks if anyone else had seen his face.
Johnson, continuing to gaze intently at the floor, shouts out "I think my wife got a glimpse."
And that's when the fight started...
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