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Street Accounting

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 08 August 2017
Hits: 2106

Little Johnny is always being teased by the neighborhood toughs for being stupid. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime. Little Johnny always takes the nickel, causing no amount of snickering and glee among the bullies.

One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, nice Mr. Johnson pulls him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel is bigger?"

Johnny grins and says, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd probably stop. Right now I'm up more than twenty bucks on those mooks!"

Tough To Find Good Help

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 07 August 2017
Hits: 3105

Maid: "I want a raise. I fuck better than you."

Wife: "My husband said that?"

"No, all the landscapers."

Give Me One In A Bun

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 06 August 2017
Hits: 3302

How can you tell if you're at a gay barbecue?

The hot dogs taste like shit.

How To Really Tie One On

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 05 August 2017
Hits: 2679

A string walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry pal, we don't serve strings here."

So the string walks outside, ties himself in a loop and messes up the top of his hair. He walks back into the bar and orders a beer.

The bartender squints at him and says, "Hey, aren't you a string?"

The string says, "Nope, I'm a frayed knot."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Don't Ask

My wife was curious. She asked: "When do married men stop jerking off?"

I told her: "When they get divorced."

And that's when the fight started...

I Love Bird Watching

What species of bird is known to give the best head?

The swallow!

What's Your Favorite Burger Joint?

How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?

He forgot to wrap his whopper.

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