I don't wanna brag, but my dick is so big, the head has only seen my balls in pictures. Get that ladies?
I know that newspapers are losing out to the Internet, but think about it... how many newspapers can a woman hold between her legs?
Easy! One Post, two Globes, and many Times. And I wouldn't mind a morning and an evening edition. Yeah... I like a woman who's into the hard news.
OK... I'm done.
I was talking to my wife about what might happen after I died. I told her: Promise me one thing... that 6 months after I die you'll marry Bernie." She said: "I thought you hated Bernie."
"I do"
And that's when the fight started...
A man calls his wife into the bedroom. "I want to show you the new watch I got today."
She walks in and finds him with his pants down. "That's not a watch!" she says.
"It will be once you put two hands and a face on it."
