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Every Frickin' Joke

Merry Christmas!

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 25 December 2015
Hits: 2787

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. It represents a candle, he said. You may pass through the pearly gates Saint Peter replied.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells" . Saint Peter said you may pass through the pearly gates.

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "They're Carol's".

Better Than A 5 Star Hotel!

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 24 December 2015
Hits: 3148

What is the smallest hotel in the world?

A pussy, cause you have to leave the bags outside.

Name Game

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 23 December 2015
Hits: 2793

What did the Jewish guy and his Chinese wife name their baby boy?

Ka Ching!

Weight Watchers

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 22 December 2015
Hits: 3202

My wife's losing weight now thanks to a weight loss club. She goes near the fridge, I hit her with the club.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Smells Like A Good Time

What's the difference between pussy & pot?

If you can smell pot from across the room it's the good stuff.

A Hobby For My Old Age

A doctor examining a little old man tells him, "You're suffering from exhaustion. How often do you have sex?"

​The old guy says, "Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday."

The doc says, "Well, that could be the problem. Maybe you should try eliminating Wednesdays."

The old guy replies, "I can't, Doc. That's the only night I go home."

What's For Dinner?

Why'd the bride slide down the bannister on her honeymoon?

To warm up her husband's dinner.

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