Every Frickin' Joke

She Blew It

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 10 January 2016; Hits: 3191

What's the difference between a penis and a bonus?

Your wife will always blow your bonus!

Stir Fry And Panties

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 09 January 2016; Hits: 3830

How's a frying pan hanging on the wall like a woman's panties?

You have to get them down before you can put the meat in.

Staying Hard

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 08 January 2016; Hits: 3757

Did you hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring?

He changed his mind. Decided to stick it out for one more year!

A True Poet

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 07 January 2016; Hits: 3431

My contribution to poetry & truth:

Roses are red that much is true. But violets are purple not fucking blue.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Dad Knows The Score

When I was 16, my dad sat me down and said, "Dick, someday you're gonna meet a girl who's gonna be so right and so wonderful and so perfect that you're not even gonna haggle about the price."

Dig Deep In The Memory Banks

A man picks up a cute little number in a bar and convinces her to come back to his hotel. After they're done screwing around he asks, "Am I the first man you ever made love to?"

She looks at him thoughtfully for a second before replying. "You might be... your face looks familiar."

Be Nice Or You Won't Get Any

Little Johnny's walking along with his father when he sees a butterfly. He grabs it, throws it on the ground,and stomps on it. His father says, "Son, that was unnecessary violence. You may not have any butter for a month."

They walk a little further and Little Johnny sees a honey bee. He grabs it, throws it on the ground, and stomps on it. His father says, "Once again, son, unnecessary violence. You may not have any honey for a month."

That night, Little Johnny's having dinner with his mom and dad when a cockroach goes running across the table. His mother knocks it off the table and stomps on it. Little Johnny looks at his dad and says, "Well, Pop, are you gonna tell her, or should I?"