Every Frickin' Joke

What Are You Worried About?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 29 December 2015; Hits: 2915

What did the banana say to the vibrator?

Why are you shaking she's going to eat me.

Some things last forever ... and some don't!

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 28 December 2015; Hits: 2708

What's the difference between love and herpes?

Love doesn't last forever.

Do You Swallow?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 27 December 2015; Hits: 3197

Why doesn't Chelsea have any brothers and sisters?

Monica swallowed them.

Make Sure It's Tight

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 26 December 2015; Hits: 3009

What do a walrus and Tupperware have in common?

They both like a tight seal.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Time For A Quickie

A man walks into the kitchen and finds his wife boiling eggs. She looks at him passionately, lays on the counter, and says, "Make love to me Randy!"

Not wanting to lose the chance he embraces her quickly and they make passionate love.

When they are finished he asks her, "What was that about?"

She replies, "The egg timer was broken."

Just Plain Stupid

A man and his wife were traveling down the highway when they saw the lights of a patrol car behind them. When they pulled over, the patrol man came up to the window and said, "I am going to give you two tickets. One because you were speeding and one because you didn't have your seat belt fastened."

The man said, "I did too have my seat belt fastened. I just loosened it when you came up to the car." The Patrol Man said to the man's wife, "I know he didn't have his seatbelt fastened. Isn't that right, lady?"

She replied, "Well, officer. I learned a long time ago not to argue with my husband when he's drunk."

Pillow Fight

What does it mean when your wife is lying in bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.