Why doesn't Chelsea have any brothers and sisters?
Monica swallowed them.
The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with.
I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me up all night!"
And that's when the fight started...
The night before her wedding, the bride-to-be talked with her mother. "Mom," she said, "I want you to teach me how to make my new husband happy."
The mother took a deep breath and began, "When two people love, honor, and respect each other, love can be a very beautiful thing..."
"I know how to fuck him, mom," the daughter interrupted. "I want you to teach me how to make a great lasagna."
My wife came out of the shower, winked at me and said, "I shaved my pussy! You know what that means?"
I said, "Yeah the fucking drain is clogged again."
