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Another One Into A Bar

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 13 November 2014
Hits: 3556

Baby seal walks into a bar.

Bartender says "What'll it be?"

Baby seal says "Anything but a Canadian Club."

So What Does It Mean?

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 12 November 2014
Hits: 3532

What's it mean when two lesbians make love?

It doesn't mean dick.

Where Shall We Go?

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 11 November 2014
Hits: 3298

My wife wanted to go on a pleasure trip.

I told her:  "Great, let's take your mother to the airport."

And that's when the fight started...

How To Tell The DIfference

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 10 November 2014
Hits: 3010

What's the difference between a girl who spits and a girl who swallows?

A wedding ring.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

It's All In The Name

An inventor walks into the Patent Office office and says to the girl behind the desk, "I'd like to register my new invention, a folding bottle."

The clerk asks. "What do you call it?" He tells her, "I call it a fottle." She says, "That's kind of silly, but OK we can set you up."

He says, "Thanks, I'll work on the name. Hey, I also have a folding carton too."

She says, "Really? And what do you call that?" He says, "A farton."

She says in disgust, "That's totally offensive. You can't use that name."

He says, "Uh-oh! I guess I'll have to scratch the one I was going to use for my folding bucket."

Like A Bird

One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defense.

"Your Honor," she began coolly, "I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly."

Cannibal Culinary Habits

Why won't cannibals eat divorced women?

They're too bitter.

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