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Another One Into A Bar

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 13 November 2014
Hits: 3502

Baby seal walks into a bar.

Bartender says "What'll it be?"

Baby seal says "Anything but a Canadian Club."

So What Does It Mean?

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 12 November 2014
Hits: 3465

What's it mean when two lesbians make love?

It doesn't mean dick.

Where Shall We Go?

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Published: 11 November 2014
Hits: 3232

My wife wanted to go on a pleasure trip.

I told her:  "Great, let's take your mother to the airport."

And that's when the fight started...

How To Tell The DIfference

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 10 November 2014
Hits: 2968

What's the difference between a girl who spits and a girl who swallows?

A wedding ring.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Only The Best For My Princess

A father has three daughters who are all getting married on the same day.

He asks his oldest daughter, "Whom do you wish to marry?" She says, "Father, I wish to marry the man with three dragons on his chest."

He walks over to his second daughter and asks her the same question. She replies, "Father, I wish to marry the man with two dragons on his chest."

He then goes to his youngest daughter and asks her the same question. She replies, "I wish to marry the man with one draggin' on the floor!"

Merry Christmas!

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. It represents a candle, he said. You may pass through the pearly gates Saint Peter replied.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells" . Saint Peter said you may pass through the pearly gates.

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "They're Carol's".

Like The Back Of My Hand...

We were getting ready in the bathroom together when my wife started putting her deodorant on. Thinking she was being cute she asked: "What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman?"

I told her: "The back of my hand."

And that's when the fight started...

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