What's the difference between a girl who spits and a girl who swallows?
A wedding ring.
What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip-off!
I told my wife I was so pleased she treated me like a God. She looked at me and asked, "What do you mean?"
I told her, "Every evening at dinner you give me a burnt offering."
And that's when the fight started...
Harry and his wife go to a party on a Friday night.
Saturday morning they wake up and his wife tells him, "Boy, were you loaded last night. You insulted your boss for ten minutes straight. He finally fired you."
Harry says, "Fuck my boss."
She says, "I did. You go back to work Monday."
