Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

How do you know if your wife's dead?

You stick your dick in her mouth and she doesn't turn her head.

Gal to cashier: "I'm in a hurry, can you please check me out?"

Clerk looks her up & down: "Nice tits, babe!"

What's it called when a WWE wrestler ties his opponent's dick in a knot?

A Willie Nelson.

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Dear Santa,

I've been good all year. Okay, most of the time. Well, more like once in a while...

Oh f*ck it I'll buy my own shit!

- Billy

How come during sex it's OK to say, 'Who's your daddy?,' but it's not OK to say, 'I love you, mommy'?

Many people have been asking who I'm voting for in the next election. My answer:

"To tell you the truth, I'm never voting again...Because voting is like marriage, no matter who you choose, it turns out bad."

More Reliable Than A Pulse