Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

How do you know if your wife's dead?

You stick your dick in her mouth and she doesn't turn her head.

Gal to cashier: "I'm in a hurry, can you please check me out?"

Clerk looks her up & down: "Nice tits, babe!"

What's it called when a WWE wrestler ties his opponent's dick in a knot?

A Willie Nelson.

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What does bungee jumping & a hooker have in common?

Cost: a 100 bucks. If the rubber breaks you're screwed.

"Mom I tied the knot."

"Great. Now kick out the chair he's standing on & you're finally rid of the jerk."

Two old ladies are sitting on the park bench feeding the pigeons. Suddenly the first one says to her friend: "Did you just fart?"

Her friend answers: "Of course I did. You think I always smell like this?"

More Reliable Than A Pulse