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Dick Jokes

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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Advice From Dick

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Good advice from old Dick Johnson: You gotta stick it out if your're gonna start young!

Not Quite A Sonnet

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Definition of love: Your heart melts and comes squirting out the end of your dick.

It's About Time

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20 years the wife finally gives him a blowjob.
 
Phone rings he picks it up says: It's for you, cocksucker.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Making Love

A married couple thought they were way too interested in sex, so they decided to make love only in the months that had an "R" in them. This worked OK until they hit May, June, and July.

Finally, the husband came home from work onr night and asked his wife, "What month is it?" 

She looked up at him and smiled, "Aurgust,"

Why Don't You Kiss Me Like That?

I was walking in the park the other day with my wife when she pointed to a young couple sitting on a bench, passionately kissing. "Why don't you do that?" she asked.

"Honey," I replied, "I don't even know that woman!"

And that's when the fight started...

They Do Look The Same

This lady is shopping in a supermarket when she notices a handsome muscular boy doing the bagging at one of the checkouts. Making sure she goes through his line, she leans over and asks if he'll carry her groceries out, to which he responds, "Sure lady."

They no sooner get out of the store when she again leans over and whispers, "You know, I have an itchy pussy."

The young man responds, "You'll have to point it out lady, all those Japanese cars look alike to me!"