Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

Judge Calloway's court docket was too full.

So he knocked the sodomy charge down to "following too close."

My wife cheats when we play board games. Last night I'm playing Monopoly with the kids and she was in the garage bangin' the landscaper.

1st you forget names, then faces. Next it's pulling your zipper up, And finally you forget to pull it down.

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How can you tell if your wife's dead?

The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

A guy's in his car with a girl and says, "How about a hand job?"

She says, "What do I have to do?"

He says, "Remember when you were a kid and you used to shake up a Coke bottle and spray your brother with it? Just do that."

She grabs it and does it. A few minutes later, he starts screaming. She says, "What's wrong?"

He says, "Take your fucking thumb off the end."

Gal to cashier: "I'm in a hurry, can you please check me out?"

Clerk looks her up & down: "Nice tits, babe!"

Take the Plea