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Dick Jokes

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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Take the Plea

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Judge Calloway's court docket was too full.
 
So he knocked the sodomy charge down to "following too close."

Take A Walk On The Boardwalk

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My wife cheats when we play board games. Last night I'm playing Monopoly with the kids and she was in the garage bangin' the landscaper.

Musings From George Burns

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1st you forget names, then faces. Next it's pulling your zipper up, And finally you forget to pull it down.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

A Pop Quiz

Here's a math question. If you get into bed 9 hours before you have to wake up, and your wife wants to have 2 hours of sex, how much sleep will you get?

Answer: 8 hours, 57 minutes - who cares what she wants!

Bend Over

A middle-aged guy goes to the proctologist for his yearly checkup. He strips down, and the doctor tells him to bend over.

The doctor puts his middle finger all the way up the guy's ass and says, "Is that uncomfortable?"

The guy says, "Not as long as I don't feel both of your hands on my back."

They Never Grow Up...

Why is psychoanalysis faster for men than women?

When he has to go back to his childhood he's already there.