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Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Best Chance For A Full Recovery

Hits: 2977

Surgeons prefer operating on politicians.

No guts, heart or spine & the mouth & asshole are interchangeable.

Soon Enough Young Man

Hits: 2863

Little Johnny in the bathtub points at his dick: "Mommy, is my brain in there?"

"Not yet, sweetie."

Recipe For Success

Hits: 2729

4 shots of tequila & I bang my wife doggie style.

2 makes her horny & 2 more gets her out on the front lawn.

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Stir Fry And Panties

How's a frying pan hanging on the wall like a woman's panties?

You have to get them down before you can put the meat in.

Deductive Reasoning

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping. As they look up into the sky, Holmes asks, "Watson, tell me what you see."

Watson says, "I see millions of stars." Holmes then asks, "And what does that tell you?" Watson thinks for a minute then says, "Astronomically, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"

Holmes answers, "It tells me somebody stole our fucking tent."

What Is This, A Joke?

A Jew, a Catholic and a Mormon were having drinks at the bar after an interfaith convention.

The Jew, bragging about his virility said, "I have four sons, one more and I’ll have a basketball team!"

The Catholic pooh-poohed this accomplishment, stating, "That’s nothing, I have 10 sons, one more and I’ll have a football team."

To which the Mormon replied, "You guys don't have a clue. I have 17 wives, one more and I’ll have a golf course!"