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Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

You Know You've Done It

Hits: 2681

Women are like parking spots. With all the good ones taken & nobody looking, you stick it in a disabled one.

Correct Dosage

Hits: 3920

Why shouldn't you cut suppositories in half?

They're supposed to be shoved up your ass whole.

No Tricks Here

Hits: 2728

What's a sure-fire way to give a woman an orgasm?

Who cares?

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

No Need to Explain

Why are blondes so easy to get into bed?

Who cares!

We're Not Crazy ... Yet!

What did one saggy tit say to the other saggy tit?

If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts!

In The Spirit of Giving

The local United Way discovers that it had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. So a local volunteer calls him and says, "Even though your annual income is well over a million dollars, our research shows you've never made a donation to our organization. Would you like to give back to the community through The United Way?"

The lawyer says, "First, did your research show that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness and has huge medical bills far beyond her ability to pay?" The rep says, "No."

The lawyer says, "Second, did your research show that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair and is unable to support his wife and six children?" The rep says, "No."

The lawyer says, "And finally, did your research show that my sister's husband died in a terrible car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage and three children?" The rep says, "I had no idea."

So the lawyer says: "Think about it. If I wouldn't give to any of them, why the hell would I give to you!"