A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Location, Location, Location

Hits: 2973

Teenage daughter after a movie: "Had to change my seat 3 times."

Mom: "Did someone harass you?"

"Finally!"

Won't Be A Starving Artist Much Longer

Hits: 2843

Gallery owner: "Guy came in bought all your paintings."

Artist: "Great."

"Not really, he was your doctor."

More Than One Way To Please

Hits: 3181

The masochist begs: "Beat me, beat me."

The sadist smiles and says: "Nooooo!"

Page 4 of 149

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Seize The Moment

A guy comes home from work and finds his wife on her hands and knees in the kitchen scrubbing the floor. She only has an apron on so the husband gets a big hard on. Seizing the moment he quickly slips it in and starts humping her doggie style. When he's through he pulls out and at the same time hits her real hard up side the head.

"What was that for?" the wife screamed "Here I am being so nice to you, letting you really enjoy yourself. Why'd you hit me?"

The husband looks at her and says "For not looking back to see who it was."

Roll Call

Every morning the teacher took roll call by having her students stand up and recite a short poem. The first to go sat in the front row and was the teacher's pet. He stood and said, "My name is Dan. When I grow up to be a man, I want to go to Japan... if I can, and I think I can."

Next up was a little girl who sat in the middle of the room. She stood and answered roll call by reciting, "My name is Suzy. When I become a lady, I would like to have a baby... if I can, and I think I can."

Finally it was Little Johnny's turn, a wise guy who sat way in the back of the room. He stood up and said, "My name is Johnny, and I don't give a crap about Japan. But I'd sure like to help Suzy with her plan... if I can, and you bet your sweet ass I can!"

I Can't Hear You

What do you call a deaf bully?

Anything you want.