Teenage daughter after a movie: "Had to change my seat 3 times."
Mom: "Did someone harass you?"
"Finally!"
A recent survey shows that sperm banks beat blood banks in contributions... HANDS DOWN!
My wife and I were having our usual debate over which of two sexes... male or female... who's superior.
So I asked her: "Do you know the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?" She said, "What?"
I told her: "One's a superhero and the other is an instruction."
And that's when the fight started...
Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil.
(uhhhh....Yeah, I have the same feeling you are having! :-O)