Every Frickin' Joke

Nice Package

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 18 July 2015; Hits: 3306

What's a pussy?

The box a dick comes in.

Did you see that one coming?

Rest In Peace

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 17 July 2015; Hits: 2492

Why were there only two pallbearers at the homeless guy's funeral?

There are only two handles on a garbage can.

Not A Total Loss

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 16 July 2015; Hits: 2729

Guy gets home from work on the day the stock market tumbled looking visibly upset. His wife asks: "Honey, what's the matter?"

He tells her: "I can't believe I lost half my money and I still have you."

And that's when the fight started...

Leaky Pipes

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 15 July 2015; Hits: 2907

Old guy calls a plumber. "There's a leak over my kitchen table."

The plumber asks him "When did you first notice it?"

"After it took me two hours to finish my soup last night."

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Might As Well Take In A Round

We were at the couples pregnancy preparation class. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe & was telling the men how to give the necessary support to their partners at this stage of the pregnancy.

She said, "Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you. Walking is especially beneficial. It strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier. Just make several stops and stay on a soft surface like grass or a path."

Then she turned to the men in the room, "Gentlemen, remember, you're in this together. It wouldn't hurt you to go walking with her." The room suddenly got very quiet as the men absorbed this information.

Wanting to get into the swing of things I quickly raised my hand and asked the instructor, "Would be all right if she carries a golf bag while we walk ?"

And that's when the fight started...

The Latest Technology

I told my pal: "I got a brand new digital hearing aid, $10,000!" "What kind is it?" he asked.

"Six-thirty."

Show Some Respect

My dick is so big, I have to call it Mr. Dick in front of company.