Rest In Peace

Why were there only two pallbearers at the homeless guy's funeral?

There are only two handles on a garbage can.

What do you call a woman with her tongue sticking out?

A lesbian with a hard-on.

Do you know what 6.9 is?

A good thing screwed up by a period.

A wife tells her husband: "I have good news & bad news." The husband says: "Just give me the good news."

The wife: "The paperboy isn't sterile."