What's the definition of a Yankee?
Same thing as a quickie only you do it yourself.
What is the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
The taste. Ewww...
Guy vists a doctor and tells him: Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass Of Home.'" The doctor says, "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." The patient asks: "Is that common?"
The doctor says, "It's not unusual."
What do you call a teenager who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
