Little Johnny in the bathtub points at his dick: "Mommy, is my brain in there?"
"Not yet, sweetie."
How come during sex it's OK to say, 'Who's your daddy?,' but it's not OK to say, 'I love you, mommy'?
What's the best way to keep kitty litter fresh?
Kill your cat.
Here's Dick Johnson's secret to a happy marriage.
Two times a week, my wife and I go to a nice restaurant and have a little wine and good food.
She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.