Every Frickin' Joke

Mother-In-Law's Gift

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 04 October 2014; Hits: 2945

Last year, I bought my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift.

This year I didn't buy her anything..

When my wife asked me why I didn't buy her mother a gift this year I told her "Hey, she never used the gift I bought her last year!"

And that's when the fight started...

Women Are A Mystery

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 03 October 2014; Hits: 3309

Why can't a woman ever be satisfied?

Because no man has a dick made out of chocolate that shoots money.

Happy Anniversary

: Category: And that's when the fight started...; Published: 02 October 2014; Hits: 3077

I asked my wife: "Where do you want to go for our anniversary, honey?"

It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.

"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.

So I suggested: "How about the kitchen?"

And that's when the fight started...

Cop Pulls A Guy Over

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 01 October 2014; Hits: 3969

A cop pulls a guy over and says, "Hey pal... did you know your wife fell out a few blocks back?"

"Thank God... I thought I went deaf."

Page 285 of 286

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Who's Counting

My wife was angry. She said: "It's unfair! A guy can screw a different girl every week and he's considered a stud. But if a girl screws even two guys in a year she's called a slut."

So I man-splained it to her: "Think of it this way. If a key opens lots of locks it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys... well... it's a shitty lock."

And that's when the fight started...

What night is it?

What's the difference between a wife and the trash can sittin' in your garage?

You at least take the trash out once a week.

More Meat Please

A guy from America asked the gal from Sweden to dance at the college fraternity party. While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, "In America, we call that a hug". She replies, "Yaah, in Sweden, we call it a hug too."

A little later, he gives her a peck on the cheek, and says, "In America, we call that a kiss". She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a kiss too."

Towards the end of the night, and a whole lot of drinks later, he takes her out on the campus lawn, and proceeds to have sex with her. While he's pumping away he leans over and says, "In America, we call this a grass sandwich".

She says, "Yaah in Sveden, we call it a grass sandwich too. Only we usually put more meat in it."