How are a lawyer and a prostitute different?
The prostitute stops fucking you after you're dead.
What's the difference between your job and a whore who dropped dead?
Tomorrow your job will still suck!
Why do women wear black underwear?
They're in mourning for the stiff they buried the night before.
My wife was amazed to read about a farmer who claimed he sold a cow with a pussy like a woman for $10,000.
I told her: "That's not amazing, that's irony. Here I am with you... a pussy like a cow, and you ain't worth shit."
And that's when the fight started...
