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Every Frickin' Joke

Happy Face

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 25 December 2014
Hits: 2606

Why did the snowman have a smile on his face?

Because the snowblower was coming down the block.

Those Fat Bastards In Corporate

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 25 December 2014
Hits: 2773

Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?

You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit!

Why Santa Doesn't Have Children

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 25 December 2014
Hits: 2083

Why doesn't Santa have any children?

Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.

Don't Be A Dick

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 25 December 2014
Hits: 2309

On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his brand new bike. The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" The kid says, "Yeah."

The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket.

The kid takes the ticket and before the cop rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Humoring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did."

The kid says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Sex Is Always On Time

Typical macho guy married a good-looking broad and after the wedding, he laid down the rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't want any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any questions?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."

Where Not To Save Money

What do you call a cheap circumcision?

A rip-off!

It Takes More Than One

After weeks without gettin' any I got really pissed off and asked my wife: "What has two arms, two legs, two boobs & sucks?"

Before she could even think of a reply I told her: "You and a vacuum cleaner."

And that's when the fight started...

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