Those Fat Bastards In Corporate

Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?

You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit!

Little Johnny in the bathtub points at his dick: "Mommy, is my brain in there?"

"Not yet, sweetie."

Dwarf to doctor: You're pretty busy. You treat dwarfs?

Doc: Yeah but you'll have to be a little patient.

Last Xmas Aunt Ellen hung herself.

As a traditional family, we didn't take her down until after New Year's.