D*ck Joke of the Day
A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.
  • Home
  • Dick Jokes
  • Just Plain Funny
  • That's when the fight started
  • WTF?!
  • About
  • Send Dick A Joke

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

  1. You are here:  
  2. Home
  3. Every Frickin' Joke

Every Frickin' Joke

Probably Better To Believe In Santa

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 26 December 2014
Hits: 2870

You know what happens when you stop believing in Santa Claus?

You start getting clothes for Christmas.

Until I Met A Boy Who Had No Hands

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 25 December 2014
Hits: 2753

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas?

Gloves! 

Just kidding, I don't know what he got, he hasn't opened it yet.

A Smart Blonde?!

Category: Just Plain Funny
Published: 25 December 2014
Hits: 3037

How is Santa Claus like a smart blonde?

They both don't exist!

Ho Ho Ho, Now This Is A Merry Christmas

Category: Dick Jokes
Published: 25 December 2014
Hits: 3097

One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by a beautiful 19 year old blonde. She said "Santa, will you stay with me?"

Santa replied, "Ho Ho Ho gotta go, gotta go, gotta deliver these toys to good girls and boys."

So she took off her night gown, wearing only a bra and panties, she asked "Santa, now will you stay with me?"

"Ho Ho Ho gotta go, gotta go, gotta deliver these toys to good girls and boys."

She takes off everything and says "Santa, now will you stay with me?"

Santa replies "Gotta stay, gotta stay, can't get up the chimney with my d*ck this way!"

Page 258 of 286

  • 253
  • 254
  • 255
  • 256
  • 257
  • 258
  • 259
  • 260
  • 261
  • 262

Don't Miss These Jokes!

All In Due Time

A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. When she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's Day. What do you think it means?" "You'll know tonight," he told her with a wink.

That evening, he came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Excited, she opened it to find her gift -  a paperback book titled "The Meaning of Dreams."

And that's when the fight started...

Advice For Gardeners

Easy, inexpensive way to get rid of weeds: Put 2 cups of Epsom salt and a 1/4 cup of dish soap in a gallon of vinegar. Shake well.

Then tell your family you're going to mix it in their food if they don't get off their lazy asses and go outside and yank up the goddamned crabgrass.

Really, Legally, Blind, Really!

What'd the blonde say when she saw a guy walking two dogs?

"He must be really blind."

Copyright © 2026 D*ck Joke Of The Day. All Rights Reserved.