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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Better Than Nothing

Created: 07 July 2015
Hits: 3174

Why is sex with your spouse like a convenience store?

There's not much variety, but what else is open at three in the morning.

A Dead Man!

Created: 06 July 2015
Hits: 3957

After 20 years of marriage, I still get blow jobs.

If my wife finds out, she'll fucking kill me.

Doggie Style

Created: 05 July 2015
Hits: 2774

A guy, seeing two dogs going at it on the lawn says to his buddy, "You and your wife ever do it like that?"

"Only once" says his friend. "And it took 5 drinks to get her out in the yard."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Not That Kind Of Sperm Bank

Sex is like a bank account.

First you put it in. Once you take it out you lose interest.

Not Much To Do

A guy drives into a tiny southern town and parks in front of the one building in town that's marked General Store. He gets out and spots an old guy sitting and rocking on the porch. He says to the old guy, "What a God-forsaken place. What do you people do around here?"

The old guy says, "We don't do nothin' but hunt 'n fuck." The stranger asks, "What do you hunt?"

The old guy says, "Somethin' to fuck."

Only You Can Prevent Forest Fires

Why doesn't Smokey the Bear have any kids?

Because every time Mrs. Smokey gets hot, he covers her with dirt and beats her with a shovel.

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