Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

The teacher asked Little Johnny, "Why is your cat at school today Johnny?"

Johnny replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that pussy once Johnny leaves for school!'"

Women fake orgasms to have relationships

Men fake relationships to have orgasms.

Do you know what 6.9 is?

A good thing screwed up by a period.

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Two stock brokers are checking out a new secretary.

The first one says, "She's got nothing going on upstairs."

The second one says, "That wouldn't be the floor I'd be getting off on."

A nurse walks in and says, "Doc, what are you doing?"

He says, "I'm writing a prescription."

She says, "But you're holding your thermometer."

He says, "Jesus Christ, some asshole has my pen."

My wife suggested we go to a marriage counselor to work on our relationship. I said sure. We get there and the therapist asks me to tell how I felt.

I said: "I knew right from the beginning our marriage wouldn't work. I'm an Aquarius and she's a cunt."

And that's when the fight started...

Here Pussy, Pussy, Pussy...