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Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Never Give Up The Search

Hits: 2973

What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?

A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

Who's My Real Dad?

Hits: 2899

A son asks, "Dad, how come I have brown skin and you are white?"

"Well son, just take a look at your mother,".

"But Dad, she's not black either."

"I know, you idiot! She's a fucking whore!"

Is She A Slut Or A Bitch?

Hits: 3592

The difference between a slut & a bitch? A slut will screw anyone. A bitch will screw anyone but you.

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Merry Christmas!

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. It represents a candle, he said. You may pass through the pearly gates Saint Peter replied.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells" . Saint Peter said you may pass through the pearly gates.

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "They're Carol's".

The Voice of Experience

Husband asks: "Should I watch porn or hockey?"

Wife: "Watch porn. You already know how to play hockey."

And that's when the fight started...

Sex Ed

Little Johnny was in sex ed class when the teacher began a discussion about genitals. Johnny shouted out, "My old man has got two of those"

The teacher was shocked and asked Johnny to explain.

"Well, the small one he uses when he takes a piss. And the large one he uses to brush the baby sitter's teeth."