Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

When do you know you've been married too long?

The only reason you go down on it is because it doesn't talk back.

The difference between a whore & a bitch?

A whore fucks everyone at the party. The bitch? Everyone but you.

What did one gay sperm say to the other gay sperm?

I can't see a thing with all this shit in here!

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A man calls his wife into the bedroom. "I want to show you the new watch I got today."

She walks in and finds him with his pants down. "That's not a watch!" she says.

"It will be once you put two hands and a face on it."

A middle-aged guy goes to the proctologist for his yearly checkup. He strips down, and the doctor tells him to bend over.

The doctor puts his middle finger all the way up the guy's ass and says, "Is that uncomfortable?"

The guy says, "Not as long as I don't feel both of your hands on my back."

When I die, I want to go like my Grandfather...in his sleep.

Not screaming like the other passengers in his car.

Going Downtown