The difference between a whore & a bitch?
A whore fucks everyone at the party. The bitch? Everyone but you.
What sexual position should a woman use to make an ugly kid?
Ask your Mom.
What do you do in case of fallout?
Put it back in and take shorter strokes.
Nacho comes before a judge. The judge asks: "Why're you here?" Nacho tells him: "I'm accused of starting my Xmas shopping early."
The judge says, "That's not a crime. How early did you start?"
Nacho says, "Before the store opened."