Why shouldn't you cut suppositories in half?
They're supposed to be shoved up your ass whole.
A cop pulls a guy over and gives him the breathalyzer test.
The cop is so shocked he says: "Jesus man... you are REALLY drunk."
The guy looks up and says; "Thank God. I thought my steering went out."
What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?
Bingo night.
Difference between a blonde and an ironing board?
An ironing board's legs are hard to open.
